Sunday, December 26, 2010

My Mom.

Today is a different kind of post. While I try to keep my life filled with happy, positive thoughts, my wonderful family and lots of crafts, there are a few times a year that are hard. The hardest is today.

Let's start at the begininning July 1, 2003. The day my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer. This day is a blur and crystal clear in my memory at the same time. My mom thought she had pulled a muscle in her shoulder. She had seen a doctor, who scheduled an MRI, who scheduled other tests. One thing led to another and her pulled muscled turned out to be an inoperable tumor in her lung. My mom, who had never smoked a day in her life had lung cancer. To this day, I don't know how this is possible. Her dad smoked, her sister smoked...and they both died of lung cancer. But how did my mom get it? Was the second hand smoke exposure that bad? Bad luck? Bad genes?

The following month was my sister's wedding. The last truly happy event we had as a family of four. Mom looked great, even though she had already gone through a round of radiation and chemo. We were able to enjoy the day, dance the night away and forget, for a few hours, about reality.



By the time my sister got back from her honeymoon, mom's hair had fallen out and she was wearing a wig. It looked just like her real hair, which I know was a relief to my mom.

The months went by, with mom doing more chemo, more radiation, and being in and out of the hospital for various things. From the beginning, the outlook was not good. I think I was in a denial...who wouldn't be? Her birthday was spent in the hospital. I remember lying with her in her hospital bed, watching thanksgiving specials on Food Network. She was out for Thanksgiving, but couldn't eat. Her nausea was terrible, at all times, so a port was put in to give her the nutrients she needed.

About two weeks after Thanksgiving, her port got infected. I was at school that day. It was the week before Christmas break and I was working a basketball game after school. I knew mom was going in for surgery that day to replace the port and get help for the infection. It was suppose to be a simple surgery--in and out and back home. But something went wrong. While the doctors were operating, one nicked an artery. Because of the blood thinners she had been on, this was a diasterous event. She was put in a medical coma, to hopefully allow her body to heal and recover. She never woke up.

For 2 weeks, we went to the hospital every day. My sister and I stayed at our parents house, b/c it was closer to the hospital. We'd wake up, shower, eat and go to the hospital, where we would wait in the ICU waiting room all day, hoping she would wake up. Friends and relatives brought us lunches and dinners. My dad hardly ever left. We could force him to go home every few day to shower and sleep. But for the better part of 2 weeks he was camped out in her room or the waiting room.

My dad eventually had a talk with us about mom. Test had been done for days, but they were all negative for any brain activity. They suggested doing hospice care and just making her comfortable until the end, which is what we did. We spent Christmas in the hospital, waiting. Friends of my dad's brought us a Christmas dinner, including a card table to eat at, chairs, plates, napkins...everything. To this day, I think it was one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for us. They left it all for us to eat when we wanted, as a family.

There were a few other bright spots during those hellacious weeks. The kindness of friends, family and strangers. Spending time with my sister and dad. But mostly, I remember the heartache. My grandmother telling me that she'd been begging God to take her instead of my mom. Sitting with my mom, alone. At first begging for her to wake up, and then finally telling her it was ok to go. That I would be ok...I would make sure dad and Joanna were ok. That if she needed to let go, I wouldn't be mad.

And then, in the early morning of December 29, around 2:00 am, my dad came into my room and told me she had died. He had been with her when she did, and held her hand. I still don't know all the details of that night, and I'm not sure my dad is ready to talk about it.

Since that Christmas, I bought a house, got married, had a little boy, moved to a bigger house, had a second boy and basically have gone on with my life. But during every life event, big or small...I miss her. Every Christmas, birthday, anniversary and Mother's Day, I long for just ONE more day to talk with my healthy, happy mother. It feels like just yesterday she was here. But at the same time, it seems like forever since she's been gone.

I know that a lot of what I wrote might be rambling and not make much sense. I just wanted to write out what I remember about the last months of her life. I haven't talked about it much, and I just wanted to get it all out.




Thanks for listening.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Wonder Under...again.

I have lots to post about, but not much time. My little boy turned 3 today, so things have been hectic! But before I do a post about how wonderful the past three years have been being Henry's mom, I wanted to show you one more thing.

Last week, we were allowed to wear jeans at school IF we had a 'holiday' themed shirt. Since I don't have a lot of tacky Christmas sweaters lying around, I made a shirt with my own Christmad flair.

Ever heard of the song "I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas?" If so, this shirt will make sense. If not, then not so much!!




I already had everything but the letters, which I bought at Hobby Lobby for $3. I used Wonder Under for the hippo, and the whole shirt took about 15 minutes to make. Pretty good for $3!

But I did get some strange looks from people who had never heard of the song!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Almost 3!!

My little baby boy is almost 3! Well, I guess he's not technically my little baby anymore...especially since he has a baby brother. But STILL! He'll always be my baby! :) Since this may be the last year he doesn't care at all about what he wears, I made him a special birthday shirt. I have always loved WONDER UNDER. It's the best thing ever. We're having his first "real" birthday party this year. His daycare classmates, as well as some other friends will be heading to "Pump It Up" this Saturday. Bounces houses, slides and sugar...what more could a 3 year old want? We aren't doing much of a 'theme,' but his invitations and plates and stuff are all "Cars." My boy loves Lightening McQueen! So here's his shirt:




It's not very often that the image in my head translates perfectly to what I want in real life. But this shirt is pretty close. I LOVE it! Wonder Under probably would have been fine on it's own, but I sewed down the 3, just to make sure it survives all the bounce houses and inflatable slides.



And because the fabric is so cute and I had a ton extra, I had to add these to the back of the shirt.



Hopefully he'll love his shirt and have a great third birthday party!

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Welcome, Friends from Mama Hall!!

Hello! I hope some of Eryn's followers are dropping by to see what 'Stag Designs' is all about. This is my little piece of the internet to showcase my sewing projects, my crafts and my life! I've been sewing for years, and I love looking at sewing/crafting/mommy blogs, so I decided to try it out for myself.

Today on Mama Hall's blog, we're giving away a $25 gift certificate to spend at Stag Designs. I have many aprons for you to choose from, or you could use the $25 towards a baby clothes blanket. I'd like to show you the products I've been working on, and if you're interested in any of them, shoot me an email!

Let's start with the Adult Apron with removable dishtowel. I created this apron because I was constantly wiping my hands on the bottom of the aprons I wore at school. I was always looking for a dishtowel, and it was always on the opposite side of the kitchen. So an idea was born! I must say, it's great! I teach a Nutrition and Wellness class to high school students, and this apron has been wonderful! My towel is always nearby, and at the end of an especially messy class, I can just rip the towel off the velcro and put a new one on!

If you're interested in any of my Adult Aprons with Removable Dishtowels, they are $25 plus shipping. These are the options I currently have available:




**Aprons 6 and 7 are made from 100% cotton fabric. The rest of the aprons are made with Duck Cloth, which is also 100% cotton, but slightly thicker--closer to upholstery fabric. Both are machine washable.

I can also make you a custom apron, with the fabric and towel of your choice. Got a Cowboy's fan in the family? OU or UT? I'm a proud Texas Tech alumni, so I've got two Tech aprons in the works, that will be available for sale soon.

In addition to the Adult full size aprons, I also have Half Aprons availabe for $15 plus shipping.









If you've got a little helper around the house, they might need an apron too! The Children's Aprons are $12 plus shipping.




And finally, the project that is closest to my heart is my Baby Clothes Blanket. This one is made from my oldest son's clothes from his first year. I had to limit myself to the first year, or it would have been a king size blanket!! I can take your onesies, pajamas, burp cloths, receiving blankets, or any other fabric that is sentimental to you and create a one of a kind blanket. These custom blankets are backed with Minky fabric in the color of your choice. For a blanket similar to this one, with 80-90 squares, the price is $120 plus shipping. Price can be adjusted if you would like a smaller or larger blanket. Just send me your clothes and a few weeks later (generally 3-4), I'll send back a blanket!






I hope you like what you've seen! If you would like to purchase any of the items above, or learn more about the custom blanket, please email me at jry25@yahoo.com.


Thanks to all of Mama Halls friends and followers for stopping by my little part of the blogosphere!


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Will I finish?

When Ryan and I first got married (and I had a lot of free time), I decided I would make our Christmas stockings. My mom made stockings for my sister and I, and they were always one of my favorite decorations to put up. So before our first christmas as husband and wife, I made these:






These stockings are super easy to make. Any beginnner sewer could figure it out...but they are SO time consuming! It's all done by hand, and the cutting, threading the sequins, beads, stuffing, sewing, etc. takes a lot of time!!

When I was pregnant with Henry, I was determine to get his stocking done before he was born. I think I finished on Dec 20...he was born the 21st.



Today, our mantle looks like this:



Notice the space in between Henry's stocking and our pet's stockings? (Yes, we're THOSE kind of people) :) That's where Sam's stocking will eventually go, right next to his big brother.



Sadly, this will be Sam's SECOND christmas with us. I had high hopes of getting his stocking done before LAST christmas, but at the time, I had a breast feeding 5 month old and a 2 year old...time to sew was hard to find. I've been making progress... we've got the main part sewn...



There is still a snowman to make and some other stuff to complete. I'm close to step 60, I think. Just 15 more to go!!



I HOPE I get done before Christmas! Where else will Santa leave all his stocking stuffer goodies?!?

Sunday, December 5, 2010

December?! And a red wreath.

December sure got here quick! This is a busy month for us. In addition to all the normal holiday festivities, my oldest will turn 3 a few days before Christmas, and my husband will turn 38 a day after. So lots of partying at the Stag house!

To continue our family tradition, we shunned all Black Friday madness and stayed home to put up our Christmas tree and decorations. The tree has been up almost a week and a half, and nothing has been pulled off, broken or destroyed...yet. I did participate in Cyber Monday, and bought myself a Silhouette (http://www.silhouetteamerica.com/). If you look at any of the big craft/sewing blogs, they were all giving them away last week. I entered all the contests...and did not win. So I bought one instead. Hopefully all sorts of craftiness will ensue once my little machine arrives!

Until then, I've been working on some camo aprons for my dad to give his friends at Christmas, and I finally got around to spray painting my wreath. It was a little touch and go at first, but I think it ended up ok.

I bought some bright red spray paint. (Banner red, if you're interested), and got to work. After the initial coat, I was really nervous. The 'Banner Red' was not nearly as red as I had thought.




In fact, I was so disappointed, I started eyeing these in my backyard.



After another coat, I started collecting them.



But finally, after the 5th coat of spray paint, it began to look better.


Thank goodness! I would have been really upset if i ruined my acorn wreath!! After a short wait, it was back on the door. It was a windy, cloudy day, so my pics aren't great. I'll try to redo them the next time it's sunny.






Gotta say, it's growing on me! I'm still going to collect more acorns and make a second wreath. One to spray paint and one to stay natural.

Next up: Finishing Sam's stocking. (I hope!)